Adventures in drunk land.

So let me start with the Wednesday recap.

School was kind of lame, somehow made it through the day. My creepy "german" stalker was being as creepy as ever. Now I'm totally gonna creep on him so that I can show all of you lovely folks (friends on facebook) what my creepy stalker actually looks like. He's creepy. Maybe he isn't that creepy looking... but his actions speak way louder than words... I seriously hope he doesn't ask for my information. I hate lying to people.

School wasn't the most exciting part of my day. I had a great time out by the river though. Good conversation, friends, and getting mah swim on. Then came karate. I won't go into too many details about that since it was my biggest failure. Belt test on sunday though. that should go quite well. PURPLE IS MINE.

After kaju is where it gets wild and crazy. You can go look at the photos if you are my friend on The Facebook...

To highlight some moments of the night:

1) snapping on a guy for dancing too close to my friend.
2) yelling at the same guy for dancing WAY too close to me.
3) drinks being spilled down my leg
4) drinking way more than I should have and NOT getting a hangover :)
5) knocking a guy over with my butt
6) talking belligerently to strangers near the bus stop
7) spending some awesome time with my friends :)

I guess I'm not going to go into details cause a lady isn't supposed to divulge all her secrets.

So, tonight is the night that everything is going to be ALRIGHT. So help me... I think I found the magic schtick into making me more mentally fit to fight. Just do a lot of exercise before the fight, stay warm before fight, and intimidate the hell out of whoever you fight. Thats GOTTA be it!! I'm ready tonight. It won't be another replay of two weeks ago. Srsly... Losing to a yellow? Homie don't play dat. Not that there is anything wrong with losing to a lower belt... its just my pride that hurts. Good for her, but bad for me!! Round two will be considerably different. Especially with all the awesome that has been bestowed upon me lately! As we speak I am staring at one of my possible opponents... BWAHAHAHA. Typing in the computer lab can be awkward sometimes. Oh well.

Tomorrow is my next weekly official weigh in. I haven't been horrible but I haven't been really awesome this week either. So we will see how this all plays out.

I am going to the river today, to work on my pasty whiteness, of course! All are welcome.

River time is like my Zen moment before karate. I love that I get to do this every week :)

Belt test on sunday. Purple here I come.


So this should be an awesome day! I'm gonna go do something productive like take a nap in the hallway or print some powerpoint slides...

When you let go of control...

Recently I have noticed that when I take a hands of approach to life, everything that I want to happen starts happening. I have always been the girl who likes to control the situation and then make sure that everything goes according to plan, and if there are any bumps in the road to make sure the crash isn't as bad as it could be or properly navigate the field of moguls as I'm flying down the mountain at the speed of life.

Some interesting things have been happening lately, first and foremost, my continued success at weight loss. Thursday is my weekly weigh date so I won't bore you with the fact that I've had a hotdog this week, or that Easter dinner was amazing and I could have eaten that whole roast given the opportunity. My way of getting to this point in my life was the usual control freak me, but the last two weeks I have just had a "who gives a damn" attitude. I've been still doing the slim fast stuff, but now only for breakfast, and now I am just managing my intake/output a lot better. I did have a delish hamburger the other night, but I believe that was balanced out by a long walk I had afterward. I think the universe is starting to pay me back for the positives I've been putting out!

Secondly, the semester is nearly over. THANK GOD. I  can't tell you how anxious I am to be done with school. I have a serious tan to work on and you don't get that by going to lectures. Heh, but I still work in the evenings. School has been a series of roller coasters and long lines this semester, and I can't wait to leave the theme park. Because of my unnerving connection with reality and all things technological I get a play by play on all of my friends. I love being able to send them messages whenever I want, and in most cases get some kind of immediate response. I have a new friend who is so off the grid it drives me insane. Absolutely INSANE. But in a good way I think. The people you meet every day are there for a reason. You are supposed to learn lessons from everybody in your life whether they be big or small and recently I have learned SO MUCH from my friends. Even the younger ones that I feel the need to play big sister to. Being a big sister is totally weird. Did you know I have a half sister? Talk about awkward. Shes a great kid, but damn, I have no idea what to say to her half the time. But you know, hands off approach :) Growing up as an only child has definitely stunted my ability to share with all the other kids... ya know what I mean?

This whole 2011 has been a gigantic eye opening experience for me. HUGE. So many things have happened and its only April... Almost May but still... I have met some of the most awesome people this year and I really hope that they stick around! AKA when you folks run off after graduation, or when I run off after graduation/getting my black belt we stay in touch. Seriously. I'm getting the fuck out of America for a year after college. Then I will come back and go to grad school. Med school. Or if I get completely frustrated with that... Law school. But for now, its going to be Dr. Bobo. And yes, I will continue to be a medical reference book when you don't want to talk to a real doctor or use google.

Life finally gave me some strawberry lemon aid.

Haute Coutoure...

Today I was walking on campus and I made a glorious revelation. I was walking behind a girl with shorty shorts. This isn't new, but the thing that I noticed most about her was that the shorts didn't fit. I think that is the #1 rule of looking "good" as a floozie and that is to wear clothes that fit. Unless you are a nasty hooker, generally one should wear clothes that are made to fit their body properly. Granted I might be guilty of wearing pants that might make my muffin top look a little over baked, but at least I keep it PG. I totally would have done one of my creepy stalker photos (as per usual) but my phone was in my backpack and I really didn't want to make a scene fumbling for my phone, I'm too tired for that. But let me describe in great detail what I saw.

The shirt that this girl was wearing actually fit quite well, and I am curious as to where I might be able to procure my own... But when she started walking up the stairs in front of me (obviously I got a great shot of her butt in my face) I noticed, firstly,  how short her shorts were. As I continued to analyze the scene I noticed, secondly, how tight those shorts were. She wasnt muffin topping per-se but things were coming out in places that should not be accentuated in any way if you might be slightly plump. Trust me, I know these things... Her thighs were literally oozing out of the shorts. Muffin Bottoming out? I don't know if there is a "term" for it, but it was really unattractive. Don't get me wrong, if a girl can wear shorty shorts and keep her junk in her trunk, more props to her... but in a general rule of thumb its best not to wear SUPER short shorts if your trunks rub together. You might as well just be wearing panties. Just don't do it. But do wear panties under your shorts... You never know who is creeping.

So lets play a little ketchup (you like that play on words? Yeah, its all me).

Fry-day was pretty much a wash as far as school went. I woke up, went to classes, went home, went to work... worked later than I would have liked to, and then I went out. I stayed out till waaaaaay too late but I had a fantastic time in doing so. I never would have known that Sewell park is so lively at 2AM. CRAZY.

Sit-urday Went to work (exhausted) I think I mentioned a doughnut at some point in time, or maybe that was the blog I started to write, but got two sentences in and kind of quit. Whatever the case may be.. that doughnut was AMAZING. Wasn't greasy and didn't give me any serious kind of heartburn/tummy trouble. Those people in Lake Travis area have it reaaaaaally good as far as unhealthy snacks go. After work (got out on time for once) I went home. I was seriously debating the river or studying or anything that would keep me distracted from my new activites. I was going to go out, but those plans fell through, so I wasn't gonna bother with making the haul to Austin. I ended up going to campus which was totally empty and awesome! I love the fact that on a Saturday afternoon/evening its totally calm. The library was closed so I was just sitting on the Quad with my buddy D. We talked about all kinds of things: boys, exercise, future plans, jobs, bitches n hos... It was a great chat. Then we went to the track and walked nearly 2 miles. Honestly I got bored and some old man kept lapping me because we were taking a leisurely stroll and he wanted to keep running the straights. After our nice walk I went to HEB.

Grocery stores are such a NIGHTMARE. I'm glad I went on saturday instead of sunday though. Its usually crazier. I bought a ton of fruits and veggies. Even got some Mesquite turkey meat. MMMMM Can't wait to eat that sammich. So I bought about 90% good healthy fresh/not frozen stuff and spent a bit more than usual cause I got some kitty litter too. That was basically the end of saturday. I went home put my groceries up and zonked out and watched The Toy, Toy Story 3, and some of a German movie called Was tun, Wenn Brecht? (What to do in case of fire). So far so good. I'm looking forward more to watching Goodbye Lennin cause I've seen that before and I'm sure when I can focus more I won't need the subtitles.

When I took my ambien that night I made the bad decision to do my nails... I am so glad that on sunday I went to my friend Leen's house and she fixed em. Even did my fingernails FOR me. They look all pretty now.

Sunday came after that...
So on Easter Sunday I think I did so many blasphemous things that it would send me straight to hell in a hand basket. I cussed at traffic... almost flipped a guy off, bought pornography (its totally a collectors item. Leslie Nielsen was on the cover. DUH, WINNING), ate fried food that was named after a derogatory term and I'm sure there were plenty of other things I did against the Easter Code, but I honestly don't know. I was just really happy to spend time with my friends and family. I got to see TWO of my favorite austin people that day, it was pretty much awesome. Later I got to spend time with my family and realize how much patience I need to gain when it comes to the attitude of my Cousin. Shes like... 12? Lord help me if she mouths off... Honestly I just blame the school she goes to and the friends shes got. The other two are pretty good though. >_< I don't understand!!! I'm sure what will happen is that when she is older and more tolerable (like all children) I will love her more. Its gonna be a while, lol. But family time was really fun regardless of sassy iphone wielding kids. I learned about how my aunt mistakenly said that her mom was "passed out" when in fact she had "passed on" to a telemarketer. Thats actually a really funny story. Something about being excommunicated? I don't remember that part too much cause there was too much raucous laughter. We were gonna have an epic Scrabble Battle Royale, but I had to leave early so I don't know if they went on without me. After family dinner I had another late night out and didn't end up going to bed until about 3AM? I got back home around 2ish, then had some girly chat time with a few friends. I am so grateful that I have my gal pals looking out for me though. I <3 them!!

GIRLS TALK TOO MUCH. As gracefully illustrated by this blog.

I had a really clever title, then I forgot it.

So, today was just a big pile of jumbled mess until about 1:30 when everything just kind of got all kinds of copacetic. Did my usual morning routine, managed to stay awake in all my classes, made up a test (due to bee sting, I missed out on Monday). Got a D. Whatevs. At this point I can't fail the class so I'm fine with it. I think its also the last CJ class I have to take! I got to register for next fall too. 16 hours won't be amazingly fun, but my class load is going to be super awesome! Two psych classes, two core classes, and an ANTH class. I don't think magic rituals and religion is required, but I want to take that to fill my electives.

ANYWAYS. I'm sure you want to know about the awesomest part of my day! Which was of course Kaju. It is Wednesday afterall. We had our team battle royale tonight. My team won by 1 point! I'm so proud! I didn't win my match, but I didn't lose either. I was up against my gal pal Kim, and we tied 7-7. It was a pretty sweet fight. The first thought that ran through my head was a scene from Pirates of the Caribbean. When Jack Sparrow was fighting Captain Barbosa "two immortals locked in battle." I say that because we ALWAYS fight eachother. I'm glad to say I stepped up my game. Normally I hate fighting her, but today was just so worth it. I didn't even win, but it felt REALLY GOOD!

Before Kaju started, I got to try out Zumba. Its like Jazzercise, except for "young" people. Its actually pretty fun! I stayed for 30/45 minutes of the class (didn't want to die before fighting). I could totally see myself doing that on a semi regular basis. If the teacher of that class lets me jump in every once in a while, I totes will. The main reason she dragged me and Kim into it was because she only had one student show up. So we (being the gracious girls that we are) stepped it up and exercised to the newbies. Shakira, Lady Gaga, Beyonce... it was all there. Almost like being at a club minus the booze and assholes groping you.

New news for the week? I'm officially in the 230's. I think I mentioned that in a previous blog, but I am SO on track for this year. This is very exciting and motivating. Other news? I'm gonna get totally wasted with my wifey this weekend. Don't worry we don't drank and drive, we drank and walk to the bus stop/take a cab :)

It should be an epic time.

The internet is for Porn

So this weekend has been crazy to say the least. After my bee incident and getting all scuba certified and whatnot, I ended up having a bunch of folks over and not watching a movie with them...? So basically we hung out for a bit and then the roomies put in a movie and everybody else wanted to watch that. Oh well. I took all my meds to deflate my ugly purple giant finger, and did my nails, cleaned my room a bit... It was actually very productive.

On monday I went to the DR at the SHC and I basically paid them to tell me stuff that I have already been doing. GREAT. I totally should be a Dr. I already know what I'm talking about 80% of the time.

The last few weeks a few things have kept popping up in conversation. So I finally caved and got the soundtrack to Avenue Q. Its about the funniest thing ever. Pretty much. Now all I gotta do is watch the play. It is a little weird listenting to someone who sounds like Kermit talk about such vulgar things. But hey, I LOVE vulgar things. As I type I'm listening to two puppets having sex. I also missed a full day of classes on monday because of the finger fiasco. whatever.

Food has been interesting. I haven't been abiding by the total slim fast rules cause I haven't been near fridgerators all that much the last few days. so I just kind of said F it and just ate small portions. STILL losing weight. Gonna do my weigh in on Thursday. Life is going at a steady pace. I have some pretty amazing friends. Tomorrow I will get some sunshine in and some asswhooping too. I got a clue as to who I am going to fight, so I am prepared for that... but I am totally not prepared to be sent out to a random opponent... If the finger won't deflate I am going to opt for a one armed free for all. I think that would actually be better for me since I practice basically one armed anyways.

I gotta make up a test tomorrow, so this is short and sweet. Time to study like a rockstar.

Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but chains and whips excite me.

I must be some kind of target of nature. When I got home today I noticed that a few God forsaken critters had bitten my foot (probably ants) and my butt (probably ants again). So I popped a couple of benadryl because of my hand, and when I woke up my finger was STILL twice the size of the other one, and really freaking itchy.

Basically, what this all means is that I'm allergic to bees. This is all very confusing to me because I never had a reaction like this before EVER. I'm considering some injections just to make the swelling go down. I can't bend my pinky all the way and its terribly frustrating. My pinky is forever out (at least until the swelling goes down). At the rate this damn thing is spreading, I kind of expect my arm to be swollen by the time I wake up tomorrow. Its sooooooooooooooooooo ITCHY. Make it stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I seriously hope that this doesnt last until wednesday. I would be so mad if I couldn't fight for some stupid reason like this. I kind of wonder how it would have effected me if it stung me closer to a serious vein or closer to my heart or something. Shiiiiiiit. I probably would have gone into anaphalactic shock and been airlifted to brack. Woo!

While I was underwater today I gained the trust of a fish and it swam really close to my good hand. Then I reached back like a pimp and I slapped a ho. It was pretty hilarious.


Itchingly yours,
Alyssa

Bringin home a baby bumble bee, won't my mommy be so proud of me!

I got stung by a motha fuckin bee today. It was practically on my pinky, and it sucked BALLS. I was just standing there all innocently at the park, waiting to do my first couple of scuba dives, MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS... and some bee comes all up on me and lands on my hand. I didn't know what it was so I flung my hand around as one would when a bug is nearby, and it STUNG me. The only consolation prize is that the little bastard died. Now my pinky is sore as hell and my knuckles are swollen. I had to stand there for like a whole minute with the little stinger in my finger while I waited for my professor to get his knife to remove said poison injector. I hate looking at my hand when it looks this gross. Its so unnatural. Last time I got stung by a bee it was way back when in CA when I was at the police academy pool and a carpenter bee stung my ass. Not fun.

**Catching up from last night here**

Last night I went out with a buddy and we saw Scream 4. Honestly I was expecting it to be okay, but what I saw on the screen was pure gold. That movie was HILARIOUS! Go out and see it. Totally worth it. Its a longish movie too. It could have been directed by M. Night Shamallama (or whatever his name is). But it was totally AWESOME!

**Today again**

So when we finally got into the water for our scuba dive, my buddy and I were the second group to go down. So I followed the stairs straight down like I was supposed to and totally missed the first platform. How do you miss a giant ass platform you ask? Because it was murky as fuck and I could barely see my hand in front of my face. So I found the second platform and it was apparently 45 ft deep. That was also 25ft deeper than my dive was supposed to be. I was all alone for about 5 minutes just sitting there waiting for someone to show up. I finally made the decision to head back up in hopes that I would find the fucking platform or I would find the surface. Either way... I was on my way up. I found the platform and just kind of wedged myself inbetween a couple and nobody noticed I was missing. FOR FIVE MINUTES. I didn't miss any of my skillz that I was supposed to perform, but I sure didn't have enough weight cause when I was trying to do my first skill I was removing my mask and I started floating away. I didn't have any problems when I was deeper... but when I was at 20ft I just kept floating away. My teach had to keep a hold on my belt so I wouldnt float away! How totally awkward. When we finally all surfaced they were like "where da fuck were you?!" I was at a platform... just the wrong one. I am totally a ninja scuba diver now. Certify that!

We did some other dives and when I was going down to "rescue" someone I forgot to deflate my BC and I was literally flopping around on the surface with my legs in the air TRYING so desperately to go underwater. That was so redonkulous that I can't even describe the WTF that was across my face when I realize "oh, too much air you dumbass" after that I deflated and was good to go.

While we were doing our booklets my prof kinda got annoyed and told me "YOU SCREWED IT ALL UP!!" Because I went wayy to deep and I had to have special depth stuff in my booklet. It was pretty much awesome though. I'm pretty much awesome. I was gonna go to Carlos n Charlies afterwards with everybody but my wifey called me and I went and had some pizza with her and spent some time chattin and catching up, and now here I am banging out this blog.

Three pounds and Im down into the 230's. Officially thats only 20 pounds off my diet, but more realistically its actually 30 lbs for the year. I hope none of you can do math! hahaha.

**Side note** for those of you who want to know, even though its easter weekend, saturday night we are gonna go out and celebrate jesus by getting totally wasted. I've done too many traditional easters for my taste. Its time to play it college style. TEAR IT UP!

There will be Blog.

So to catch everybody up on everything... I am a "single" lady. That doesn't mean I'm gonna paint the town red. I'm not that kind of girl. I guess I have finally started my journey of self discovery. Who I am now is not who I want to be down the road, and now I gotta figure out who that down the road person is cause I can only see a faint outline. Today has been/will be HELLA crazy just to add to the insanity of the week. Its only 10AM. WHAT COULD BE NEXT?!
Beats me. Well, I know what work "will be like" and I'm most looking forward to 9pm. I might be painting the town red but I just need to get out and boogie. I can't get wasted though. I was thinking about it and then said "damn girl, whats the point of getting wasted?! you are gonna feel like shit when you scuba on Saturday and Sunday" So, imbibing can be done, but not in crazy amounts. You know what? Its gonna be a good day. I have to keep telling myself that at least. I worry more about the day time than the night time. Only one more class to sit through while my professor rambles off some Deutsch instructions about something that I'm not really listening to. Its Freitag, and I'm down with the bitches and hos.

So a recap of recent events:

Monday: life is super short, who are you? One is the loneliest number.

Tuesday: Rlly?! Did I do that? (Erkel voice), skipped lab (again) went to work and played zombie.

Wednesday: TEST DAYX2 Karate tournament. Pop goes the shoulder... Oh Jesus, there is a belt test in the next couple weeks. PURPLE HERE I COME. New Gi arrived in the mail! Stayed up til 3AM divulging secrets to freends. NEVER HAVE I EVER LIKED PLAYING THAT GAME SOBER. :) until now.

Thursday: Oh shit test tomorrow... oversleep... work work work (11hr shift) shopping! study study study. cat vomits on Biology notes... Ensemble is put together (shorts are getting looser :D ) Ambien zonking. Glad I have roomies to strap my bra and tell me what looks good.

Friday, FRIDAY, GOTTA GET DOWN ON FRIDAY: Another allusion to that craptastic song, TEST IN BIOLOGY. Cat vomit is removed from notes, take test, get a free book autographed by author, and then here I am.

Now to get into details!

I only care to talk about wednesday because I had been looking forward to that day all week since the wednesday prior to it. Oh, btw, my backfist SUCKS. I felt very jipped durring my tournament but only because my points weren't being called. WHATTHEFUCK?! I should not have lost. By two points. UGH. I got kind of frustrated so I punched the girl in the boob on purpose. Oh well. It was a sanctioned event and the violence was A-OK. Also double elimination, so as long as I get back on my game in two weeks its ON like Donkey Kong. Gonna eat my bananas and throw some barrels at you. So yeah. Before the tourney I went to the river to get some zen time. Oh boy did I get it. No dogs peeing on my things, laying out in the sun... constantly having a boob check on my stupid swim suit... some kid even walked up to me and tried to convert me today. I guess I took off my "stay the fuck away from me" look on my face or she was just overly friendly and has yet to learn that adults suck :) . I swam across the river a couple of times in the really currenty part. I dove in a few times where those stair seats are, and then as I am trying to go up, POP. Balls. I know exactly what that was (cause it hurt) I got my arm in one current while I was kicking up and then into another current as I was pulling down. Bad idea. Then I went and fought got hit in just the right way to hear (and feel) that wretched pop again. I have been totally twinging every time I take my shirt off, or even think about changing. I guess I am just lucky to not have to wear that sling.

After karate I provided an AMAZING lasagna for my friends, and oh boy did they eat it. I was good and only took a small bite. Kim even brought some oreo balls that were DELICIOUS. I could have done without all that pesky chocolate surrounding the sweet oreo-y center. But that was so good. I have two more in my fridge that I have to save for cheat day because those things are like a whole meal in a literal bite size form.

I think I lost more weight this week but I havent actually stepped on a scale yet. My clothes are getting looser in the pants, however yesterday when I went by the outlet to try on some shirts, I was heavily dissapointed in the fact that my top size has not changed at all, and infact I suspect my boobs got bigger. Arent those supposed to be the first things to shrink? I was looking forward to that. Seriously... these things are huge. Its almost borderline backproblem causing. I feel kind of bad about having such huge boobs and complaining about it because so many people pay to have b-zongas like these. And then there are the less toply gifted friends. I'm more than willing to donate. TAKE THEM AWAY!!!! I guess that just means I have to work harder and do more pushups and upper body workouts. >_> I have foolishly decided to start training for a 5k. I guess that means I'm going to be one step closer to crazy town!

So, tomorrow is the big day. Tournament. What do I do? I make myself super depressed. But in every ending there is a beginning.

Its time to find out who I really am. Who knows how long that will take... Maybe I will get lucky and have another huge epiphany in Europe and know exactly what I want out of life, and maybe that won't come for a few years. As I concentrate on me, I need to go find that light at the end of the tunnel.

Other than that, I have two tests tomorrow and I'm banging my head against the wall in hopes that something will stick.

Short and sweet, just like a lolly.

Got pee? I do.

So today has been completely and utterly RUINED. I know I shouldn't get stuff like this get to me, but this was just so UNBELIEVABLE that I just got so angry. I was having a pretty good day up until about 20 minutes ago...

I decided to go to the river today since it was pretty much a gorgeous day. I had my swimsuit on, got a burger and shake over at centerpoint station, and then headed out to the chilly waters of the San Marcos river. All was fine and dandy, got my sun block on, SPF 10, layed out for a few minutes then I decided to get into the water. So I jump right into the river and it was a great feeling. Like letting go of everything! Well, I'm standing in the midway point of the river and I glance over near my things. There was a man and his dog near my stuff (I'm sure you can tell where this is going now). The dog was sniffing the grass near my stuff and the man was just kind of waiting on the dog. The dog steps closer to my things and continues to sniff... I figure the dog just smells my cats... The man drops the leash and the dog ambles closer to my stuff and kind of walks past it. But wait, the dog pauses, lifts a leg... and takes a piss on my bag and all over my shoes. I was awestruck. WHO FUCKING LETS THEIR DOG SNIFF OTHER PEOPLES STUFF AND LETS THE DAMNED DOG PEE ON SAID STUFF?!?!!? WHO DOES THAT?! The man walks off with his dog and I am scrambling to get out of the water and inspect the damage. I just start letting expletives flow out of my mouth at no regard for passing children. At this point, I don't care to censor myself because a dog just fucking peed all over my fucking stuff. Luckily my camera is waterproof. It didn't pee close enough to my phone though. If he had peed on my phone I would have gone all kinds of Hulk on his ass and woulda shoved him and his stupid dog in the river. As I left the park (cussing the whole way) I saw some park rangers headed down to the river area where I was formerly enjoying myself. I let him know that some asshole let his dog pee all over my shit. Park ranger said "sorry, no crime in that" and then he smiled and laughed at me. How would he like it if I peed all over his 4Wheeler?! How is destruction of property not a crime??? WHO DO THESE FUCKING PEOPLE THINK THEY ARE?!

I probably made the best decision by not engaging that asshole and shoving him in the river, and not shouting at that asshole "cop" and just leaving.

What a great day. UGH.

Now I have a load of laundry going and I'm about to start packing my stuff for the big move next month. Those who want to help me into my storage unit get food and a free riverrat to go float the river :)

A few fries short of a happy meal

This week has been odd. I've been feeling very adequate this week. I had a huge mind blowing revelation which will only cause problems later down the road. But that's the future, who thinks about that?! Today I would like to introduce some absolutely mind blowing crazy. A friend of mine shared his reasons for being a little sore today due to his rigorous work out called Crossfit. Honestly I've only seen pictures of what the end result of this program is, but the video he shared with me just boggles the crazy.

What crazy people do when they get bored with P90X

I watched that and it made me a little concerned for those folks' mental health! Lol. I know they are perfectly "sane" but DAMN. Did you see how crazy ripped those people are?!?!?!!? That kind of work out to me would be the equivallent of wanting to become a battered woman. You would certainly feel like it afterwards! If you are OCD about training and being superfit and having the best abs everer, then DO THIS. Apparently this is what the guys in 300 actually did to get those yum-tastic bodies. So I guess I'm totally all for it. My friend even invited me to a session of this crossfitness business and I promtly laughed in his face (typed "haha, yeah right"). Perhaps after the beating I will take from my blackbelt exam in a few years I will be silly enough to submit to this kind of torture willingly, but I will resist with my pillsbury rolls for now.

The other night I think you all remember how I posted something about running... WELL. Guess what?! It is actually good for you. Running is actually REALLY good for you. The next morning after I ran I weighed myself and I was down another pound and a half. That could have been from dehydration, but hey, numbers don't lie. Weight loss is still a loss in my book :-p Its the keeping it off thats the tricky part. I totally failed on my "gym every day this week" plan. I failed yesterday because I figured I would make up for all the not exercising with all the crazy hard dancing I would be doing. NOPE. I'm just a glorified babysitter last night. Birthday parties are great and all, but I prefer to be the one drinking :) Its good to be the DD though. It is a bit odd not having as much control over a couple of drunkies VS sober folks. I mean, COME ON. How much can a person throw up?! I haven't seen that much vomit since the exorcist, and that was freaking soup.

Have I mentioned how fun square dancing is?? Its really fun. If you don't want to do the crazy hard workout for crazy people, you should give square dancing a try. Good cardio and its FUN. In fact I would say its the most fun I have ever had with a group of elderly people. That includes the time I volunteered at a nursing home and the man asked me to open his package of crackers (which was really a domino).

Zumba looks pretty fun too, but I mostly like the ghetto booty music and stuff I hear from the class before my kaju class.

On another side note, while I was running, I was talking to a friend of mine on the tread next to me, and I was telling her about the time I had my shoulder dislocated during last semesters tournament practice. She thought I was just talking about regular old American Karate (which is apparently super lame?) and then I dropped the "K" bomb and was telling her about my professor and how badly I want to win one of his medals. It was something along the lines of "I really want to win one of those medals because he is a WORLD renowned fighter/teacher/person of Kajukenbo" and she basically slams the stop button stares at me and says "HOLY FUCK, KAJUKENBO?!?!!?!?! THAT SHIT IS HARDCORE!!!!!!!!!!!!" It was a pretty awesome moment to get some recognition from someone outside of my kaju class. It actually gave me a boost of energy to squeak out that last quarter mile of running (yeah I can talk when I run, but I don't get very far...).

I think that's enough for now. I have to go make up for my lack of workout yesterday. Time for some self flagellation!

So good I went for seconds

I had such a good day today I felt like posting TWICE. Thats right. A whole nother blog for your ocular pleasure. Every once in a while a day will be SO easy for me. Not only did the clouds part and sunlight decended upon me yesterday, I got a super good workout, I got to see a good new buddy of mine (the photographer knows who he is lol.) I had my ass handed to me and I liked it, was complimented on how fast my hands are, twice, I got to punch a couple girls in the boob (not on purpose at all) and then I didn't eat dinner with my friends but I stood in a parking lot for three hours getting to know them EVEN BETTER.

But wait! There's more...

Today I woke up around 10:30, went into work early to make an IV. I love making IV's. That is something I could literally do all day long and never get tired of puncturing a bag with a needle. I don't know what it is but it makes me feel like I'm actually doing something to help someone. Even though on the other hand I feel like I am prolonging someones suffering in a nursing home by helping them live a little longer. I'm not a fan of nursing homes, but hell... Soilant Green had the right idea kinda... Don't judge me... Anyways... My IV got cancelled and today was about the easiest day at work. We finished all the prescriptions by like 5ish, the phones died and I didn't have to talk to those lame ass LVNs and the printer died, so less work had to be done and we only fought through the absolutely NECESSARY scripts that had to go out. Baller! Not to mention I left work about 30 minutes early, ate a HAMBURGER TODAY :D:D:D:D:D:D and spent an hour on a treadmill went over three miles (I usually quit after one) and spent a good 20 minutes working out my arm muscles to improve my gimp ass shoulder.

Did I mention my tanning is actually working out?! Its nice. I'm still super white, but hey, how many chubby girls do you know that have the balls to get in a bikini and go lay out at the river? I can only think of maybe two including myself ;)

Then I'm rounding out the night with a shake and my daily regime of pills. Nothing like SlimFast to wash down the Ambien.

Whip it. Whip it good.

I suppose the thing that will drive me to continue on this mad quest is my continued success! I weighed myself this morning (ok at 11am) and lost another 2 pounds. I am still on track/ahead of schedule! Its very motivating. I stayed out rediculously late last night and I don't feel like a zombie today either.

Yesterday we were supposed to be starting out karate tournament but we just ended up practice sparring. I'm getting a little antsy for this because this year I think I have a shot at beating the girls. As long as those blackbelts don't show up, My professors award will be MINE!! Luckily I have a few years to get my blackbelt, but that also means my running away to Australia trip will be postponed. Its pretty awesome though. Who in their right mind would run off to AU when they can get a black belt with one of the most prestigious masters in the world? I certainly won't pass that golden nugget up.

Rounding out the second or third week of SlimFast (My mind has been blown to pieces with school, I can barely tell what day it is) is not terribly difficult. The hard part now is making sure I eat my solid meal at the best time for me. Since I stay up late I try not to eat anything past 8, but since thats when I get off work that makes it a little bit more difficult. THEN there are those days when I sleep in, and my first meal/shake of the day is not until noon (today was a late start day). I could get away with only eating 2 meals (a meal and a shake) but then after I get off work I stay up late working on homework/playing games/talking with roomies/keeping up with social media ect.