Today I was walking on campus and I made a glorious revelation. I was walking behind a girl with shorty shorts. This isn't new, but the thing that I noticed most about her was that the shorts didn't fit. I think that is the #1 rule of looking "good" as a floozie and that is to wear clothes that fit. Unless you are a nasty hooker, generally one should wear clothes that are made to fit their body properly. Granted I might be guilty of wearing pants that might make my muffin top look a little over baked, but at least I keep it PG. I totally would have done one of my creepy stalker photos (as per usual) but my phone was in my backpack and I really didn't want to make a scene fumbling for my phone, I'm too tired for that. But let me describe in great detail what I saw.
The shirt that this girl was wearing actually fit quite well, and I am curious as to where I might be able to procure my own... But when she started walking up the stairs in front of me (obviously I got a great shot of her butt in my face) I noticed, firstly, how short her shorts were. As I continued to analyze the scene I noticed, secondly, how tight those shorts were. She wasnt muffin topping per-se but things were coming out in places that should not be accentuated in any way if you might be slightly plump. Trust me, I know these things... Her thighs were literally oozing out of the shorts. Muffin Bottoming out? I don't know if there is a "term" for it, but it was really unattractive. Don't get me wrong, if a girl can wear shorty shorts and keep her junk in her trunk, more props to her... but in a general rule of thumb its best not to wear SUPER short shorts if your trunks rub together. You might as well just be wearing panties. Just don't do it. But do wear panties under your shorts... You never know who is creeping.
So lets play a little ketchup (you like that play on words? Yeah, its all me).
Fry-day was pretty much a wash as far as school went. I woke up, went to classes, went home, went to work... worked later than I would have liked to, and then I went out. I stayed out till waaaaaay too late but I had a fantastic time in doing so. I never would have known that Sewell park is so lively at 2AM. CRAZY.
Sit-urday Went to work (exhausted) I think I mentioned a doughnut at some point in time, or maybe that was the blog I started to write, but got two sentences in and kind of quit. Whatever the case may be.. that doughnut was AMAZING. Wasn't greasy and didn't give me any serious kind of heartburn/tummy trouble. Those people in Lake Travis area have it reaaaaaally good as far as unhealthy snacks go. After work (got out on time for once) I went home. I was seriously debating the river or studying or anything that would keep me distracted from my new activites. I was going to go out, but those plans fell through, so I wasn't gonna bother with making the haul to Austin. I ended up going to campus which was totally empty and awesome! I love the fact that on a Saturday afternoon/evening its totally calm. The library was closed so I was just sitting on the Quad with my buddy D. We talked about all kinds of things: boys, exercise, future plans, jobs, bitches n hos... It was a great chat. Then we went to the track and walked nearly 2 miles. Honestly I got bored and some old man kept lapping me because we were taking a leisurely stroll and he wanted to keep running the straights. After our nice walk I went to HEB.
Grocery stores are such a NIGHTMARE. I'm glad I went on saturday instead of sunday though. Its usually crazier. I bought a ton of fruits and veggies. Even got some Mesquite turkey meat. MMMMM Can't wait to eat that sammich. So I bought about 90% good healthy fresh/not frozen stuff and spent a bit more than usual cause I got some kitty litter too. That was basically the end of saturday. I went home put my groceries up and zonked out and watched The Toy, Toy Story 3, and some of a German movie called Was tun, Wenn Brecht? (What to do in case of fire). So far so good. I'm looking forward more to watching Goodbye Lennin cause I've seen that before and I'm sure when I can focus more I won't need the subtitles.
When I took my ambien that night I made the bad decision to do my nails... I am so glad that on sunday I went to my friend Leen's house and she fixed em. Even did my fingernails FOR me. They look all pretty now.
Sunday came after that...
So on Easter Sunday I think I did so many blasphemous things that it would send me straight to hell in a hand basket. I cussed at traffic... almost flipped a guy off, bought pornography (its totally a collectors item. Leslie Nielsen was on the cover. DUH, WINNING), ate fried food that was named after a derogatory term and I'm sure there were plenty of other things I did against the Easter Code, but I honestly don't know. I was just really happy to spend time with my friends and family. I got to see TWO of my favorite austin people that day, it was pretty much awesome. Later I got to spend time with my family and realize how much patience I need to gain when it comes to the attitude of my Cousin. Shes like... 12? Lord help me if she mouths off... Honestly I just blame the school she goes to and the friends shes got. The other two are pretty good though. >_< I don't understand!!! I'm sure what will happen is that when she is older and more tolerable (like all children) I will love her more. Its gonna be a while, lol. But family time was really fun regardless of sassy iphone wielding kids. I learned about how my aunt mistakenly said that her mom was "passed out" when in fact she had "passed on" to a telemarketer. Thats actually a really funny story. Something about being excommunicated? I don't remember that part too much cause there was too much raucous laughter. We were gonna have an epic Scrabble Battle Royale, but I had to leave early so I don't know if they went on without me. After family dinner I had another late night out and didn't end up going to bed until about 3AM? I got back home around 2ish, then had some girly chat time with a few friends. I am so grateful that I have my gal pals looking out for me though. I <3 them!!
GIRLS TALK TOO MUCH. As gracefully illustrated by this blog.
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