Has it really been since August?

So here is my bit to you all since it has certainly been a long, LONG time from my last update. I'm pretty sure that my last update involved me not being at home and typing on this very same computer (not mine).

As of this moment I am ill. Like... the kind of ill that is so frustrating that it debilitates you from doing much of anything which includes working.

As far as my weight management attempts I haven't gained anything and my last doctor weigh in puts me another couple pounds lighter! Which is good cause I feel like I've been eating out and not making wise decisions a lot concerning my food choices. For example, a friend of mine told me I need to live with her so that I will quit eating pizza so much. Well, news flash... I freaking love pizza like there is no tomorrow. I just need to exercise more so I have an excuse to actually eat it, and not feel guilty at all. Did I mention its delicious?

So back to my gross disgusting disease...

I've been hacking up all sorts of rainbow colored mucus which I can only assume means I have a slight upper respiratory infection. I got out of going to the doctor by calling the student health center and whining my way into a new albuterol inhaler. Except for the fact that the DR prescribed the big one which is irritating because I only wanted a small one. Goodbye $50, I would have used you well... So beware, cash prices on medication can very quite a bit from place to place. Lately I've been using Walgreens. When I picked up my inhaler I had my boyfriend being my nurse and standing with me. There were three groups of people there for whatever reason and only one person from each entourage were getting anything from the pharmacy, and NONE of them looked sick or ill or decrepit  in any way shape form or fashion. Not to mention they were also really loud and obnoxious which is exactly my favorite thing to deal with when picking up my "OH MY GOD I WANT TO DIE, FIX ME PLEASE" kind of drugs, how did they know? I've been controlling my cough with various different medications including, but not limited to: Norco, Ventolin, Mucinex, Zyrtec (in the rare chance that it's allergies, but its obviously not) and Ambien (cause a bitch gotta sleep, yo).

I'm pretty sure I owe my co-worker a big batch of not diseased cookies cause he is working a double since we have no other people to replace either one of us. I hope he doesn't get sick cause I can't cover his shifts. Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks.

But today in addition to being sick I sold my TV to a nice Elite Yelper and she was super excited to get the TV. I'm glad it went to a good home. I haven't driven anywhere today since nurse boyfriend is available but I am back in austin germing up his apartment and I will eventually have to take my ass back to San Marcos, germs and all.

I don't think I've ever abused an albuterol inhaler so much in my life... hah. 1-2 puffs I stick with... but every 4-6 hours? You've got to be kidding me. NOPE. You would think I know better than to disobey doctors orders, but NOPE... I'm a rebel without a cause. Actually, my cause is wellness as fast as I can get there.

Get out of my lungs you devil ailment. You're not welcome here. The power of Ventolin compels you!

The Smelly Tale of Dirty Sanchez

Well hello all! I know I've neglected you for a long while now... Like, what? Several months? Yeah lets just glaze over that fact... So here is a quicky catch up on what I've been doing:

1. Went to Africa- Did good out there, got sick once and lost 10lbs while I was there!
2. Came home from Africa- So in the jumble of all the travel mess I've kept off that insane 10lbs and have continued to lose weight! Yay me!
3. MOVED. Holy hell. That whole ordeal is probably the most annoying damn thing I've been through this whole year.

• In the moving business I'm not sure what all you know, but it was extremely stressful as you do know already. But due to the backing out of third roomie that left my current roomie and I homeless. So in the ballad of the search for our temporary forever home (while I was in Africa) there were many steps of mis. BUT long story short we ended up finding a place and had a blast and we are rounding out our first week and getting settled in. 
• This morning I weighed in again and lost ANOTHER 4lbs! Yay me! I'm doing so good! And it will only get better once the semester starts so that I can attend the gym in the mornings. Get that damn stress out! Also probably going to go to therapy and go talk to a professional about all my  "problems" Cause sometimes you just need a damn shrink. Which will probably help effect the shrinking waistline I seem to be having! HUZZAH!!!!!1!!11

So Yes, now you are thinking "WTF is up with that weird title!?" Well, I will tell you. 

So in the process of moving I was doing a bit of cleaning and of course the trash filled up and I had to travel out to the dumpster at my former apartment complex. As I was nearing my goal of the disgusting dumpsters I noticed a man pawing through the trash. He was doing it ever so slightly and only at the top. I think to myself "great, another dumpster diver..." and then I hear him call out to me. He says, "Do you need some help?" and since I was carrying a crap load (literally) of kitty litter and I said a quick and graceful "No thank you." So I amble up to the dumpster and get a good swing in to throw my feline fecal matter away and Mr. Sanchez (I don't know if that is actually his name I don't remember) introduces himself to me. He talks about how much money is just thrown away in the dumpsters with all the cans left behind from the college students. What he didn't know is that I just threw a ton of old wine bottles away. So, he keeps on talking about how hundreds of dollars are just there for the taking and pawing at the top level of the trash.

 He starts to make some small talk with me and ask about the apartment complex because he is considering moving around here. I told him immediately not to waste his time or money at this place and referred him to a previous place I lived that was the same price and a higher quality of living. So then he asks me another question which was kind of odd, "Are you mexicana?" I just go no, not really... I'm Costa Rican. He then asks me another question which was EXTREMELY weird. "Are you single?" And I am completely caught off guard with that one. I just say "Uh yeah technically but I'm seeing someone right now." And he goes, "oh thats cool, I just wanna be friends." I tell him oh okay, thats cool. He comes back with another shot, "Hey, is there any way I can get your number? That's where I say No. No sorry... and whats going through my head is "EEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IS THIS GUY TRYING TO PICK ME UP AT A DUMPSTER!??!???!?!" I did somehow manage to keep a cool head and politely decline his offer. He then asked me where I lived. Another alarm went off in my head. He then tells me "I was gonna offer to bring some beer over and we can hang out!" No thank you Mr. Sanchez. I'm not interested in being attacked in my home that I hate. So I just explained that I'm moving the following day, and that we were really busy and I had to get back to my apartment and continue cleaning.

What I have failed to mention thus far is that when he introduced himself I accidentally gave him my real first name. I did a mental face palm about 50 times after saying my name, but then I just blew it off. So then as I am finally able to walk away from my new dumpster boyfriend he calls out to me and asks me what my last name is. I kept walking away but I turned to him and yelled back "STEVENS!" It did not occur to me that it was my pharmacists last name... it also didn't occur to me that there is an Alyssa Stevens on Campus. Sorry chick, Dirty Sanchez might look you up.

So when I got back to my apartment (checking over my shoulder the entire way to make sure I wasn't followed) I immediately got on my phone and called my gentleman caller and told him my interesting new story. I had a good laugh.

So since I couldn't ever remember his actual name we came up with Dirty Sanchez.

So there is my funny story. Enjoy!

The Rains down in Africa

So as you all know I've been gone for the month of June. It was a long month and I spent it in Ethiopia. The food there was good. Can't say I would go out of my way to get it again, but I do know what I like if ever presented with the opportunity again.

So over this trip I lost some weight. I went down to my last belt notch even. Which is really nice for me, but also incredibly frustrating because none of my pants quite fit right now. You may be thinking "GO SHOPPING!!!" But that will be on hold until at least August rolls around. I think the biggest feat/challenge right now is to not eat everything in sight. It's certainly going to be a challenge, but I believe I can do it.

I weighed myself the day I got home and then again today (its been one week) and I've managed to gain one pound. SO obviously I need to stray away from bad food now.

This morning I ate a mango. I'm well on track... see? I'm stopping the soda again now that I've had every possible one I could want to drink and I suppose beer and alcohol of any sort is going to be off limits. Considering how the 4th of July went I'm totally okay with that.

I've also managed to deep fry myself, but that is beside the point. But once this burn goes away I'm back outside at 8am to go jogging. No matter how horribly humid it is. Ew. Keeping it short and sweet.

Alyssa

Do something nice for someone in June.

Here we go, one more time... Everybody's feeling fine? I certainly hope so. So I've been watching a LOT of Grey's Anatomy. A lot of it is sappy, and reminds me of moments from my past... And since I was in Target wandering aimlessly (after I got my laundry detergent) I picked up some other things. Then I started listening to the store music, which got me thinking about all the great times I've had with my friends. I relate a lot of my life to music. I remember so many things due to music. Just like people have memory triggers to smell I get memory triggers to music (as many also do). Thinking about my wonderful friends triggered me to write this blog.

Most of you know that in a few short days I am going to Africa. Ethiopia to be more specific. Addis Ababa to be even MORE specific. Saturday at 8am I am on a plane to Chicago, then London, then Addis.

But besides that little bit of info, I wanted to write a sappy blog about how much I care about all of you and how much you all mean to me. A lot of you know how much you mean to me already, but yeah sometimes I just need to reiterate that fact when I'm about to go to a third world country, and with every trip there are risks of demise.

So, as a Scorpio, according to the stars I am a tough shelled venomous creature with a hard shell. I also have a squishy mushy inside under my hard shell. I completely agree with that description. There are other bits that Scorpios are notorious for, but that is beside the point. That doesn't matter. Here are my squishy innards.

Thank you all for being super supportive, and amazing people. This last year has been an INSANE roller coaster ride of stress, emotions, and business. Without all of you I could not be me. Not saying that I depend on you to be me, but I do need all of you to put me together occasionally :)

Without those late night phone calls to bitch about whatever, and those "you need a goddamn margarita Alyssa" nights, and the goofy moments we all have together, I'd totally be in Shoal Creek.

First I had Kajukenbo to keep me on my toes physically, and without it I actually would be a walking psych patient. It gave me something to focus on, something to work towards. Every belt is an emotional hurtle. For whatever reason every single belt coincides with some kind of personal hurtle. So far I'm at purple, but I WILL be at black some day. I haven't stopped, just postponed.

There are a small few of you I will be delivering special messages to personally (via email or facebook), Just in case all hell breaks loose and I get stranded in Africa.

With my new job I started, I gained 5 great friends who I am excited to get to know better. Trivia nights have become my Kaju, and it keeps me on my toes. The anxiety involved with every round, every win, and every unfortunate loss gives me the rush of adrenaline I need to get through the rest of my week. Its where I get most of my de-stressing done even if I sit there with a glazed look in my eyes while everybody else talks about video games or comic books or what have you.

All of you (every single friend) have a special place in my heart. Even if I don't get to see you as much as I would like. My schedule never permits enough time to hang out with all of you and raise our friendship points in the most Sim like fashion. My green gem shines for you all. Upon my return I expect to get together with as many of you as I can. Especially if I don't have malaria.


But lets catch up on some other stuff. So for exactly 6 whole weeks I had this boyfriend. I thought he was a great guy until I realized that he was just an asshole wearing a nice guy suit. You people need to tell me your impressions of any "boyfriend" type person in my life. Seriously. If he is being an asshole or any kind of unusual behaviour is present SPEAK UP! The less time I spend with assholes the less likely I am to become a bitter old hag whenThe more I think about it, this is the most "abusive" man relationship I've ever been in. HOW you ask? How did I end up in that situation? Well, I ignored my instincts. Every time I ignore these instincts I pay for it. No he never hit me, or called me names or anything of a traditional abusive relationship. I just felt not good enough nearly the whole time. Oh well. I am prepared and willing to wait for my penguin. A silly/sappy analogy, I know, but yeah. Hopefully someday I will be lucky enough to come across that guy and I won't be dumb enough to let him get away. But I'm not worrying about any of the stupid boy stuff until after I get back.

As far as my health is going, nothing has changed. My weight has stayed the same. Nothing to report other than I am being more active since school has been out and also just being more aware of my choices.

As far as the title of this blog goes, Do something nice for someone while I am gone. Unbeknownst to most of you I do volunteer my time, and do nice things for others as often as I can. So maybe donate to a good cause, or give a bum a meal, or go pick up trash at a park. Who cares what you do, just do something that will benefit more than just yourself. Its for the greater good. The greater good.

Thats enough rambling for now, so take that however you like, and if you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to ask. I will get online a little bit while I'm over there but the internet is spotty, and I'll probably have to ride a goat to Europe before I get a strong connection.

My skype name is Uber_alyssa so if I can skype at all you should all add me. If you don't have skype, you should download it immediately and sign up for a free acct.


PS in case of abduction by Somalian pirates, I will be taking over their ships and I will henceforth be known as Pirate Boebel the Blackhearted. I didn't pick out my pirate name, but the one that was given to me was unusually appropriate.

Party on Wayne, Party on Garth!

So as the end of the semester inches closer and closer, my insanity or aggro is getting easier to trigger. I've been fortunate enough to have some extra relaxers around lately (not drugs, but people) that are keeping me from my imminent demise into crazy cat ladydom. That train has been temporarily derailed, but whether its for a day or for a lifetime, only time will tell! These last few weeks have been nothing short of busy busy busy. Today I was fortunate enough to have my last class of the day cancelled. Got some lunch, about to do my hair, and got to watch some TV! That never happens on tuesdays and thursdays... ANYWAYS, today I got some shiz done and when I get home from work I fully intend on putting all my laundry away! WHAAAAT?!?! I usually live out of my laundry basket, but this time... I wanna have non wrinkled clothes. for once.

tomorrow is trivia. BRING IT ON.

So last week I made it to the gym a whopping 0 times.  Yeah, thats how topsy turvy my schedule was. I skipped yesterday cause i needed a recovery time from my body hating me. I'm assuming its just from allergies. I've lived in the central texas area long enough that allergies are probably going to start effecting me. Tomorrow is a Go to the gym no matter what day, so perhaps i'm going to jog a mile straight. My biggest problem is that I get so BORED. I have ADD while running i swear...

Forgive the lack of capital letters. i really hate the keyboard I'm working on. so while I am pressing the shift key, it doesnt always work.

I can't wait to get rid of this laptop... Macbook I will have you yet!

Cheesy and insecure

NO MORE! Well... I will never, EVER stop being cheesy. That is something I cannot help as it is embedded into my genes. Seriously. Have a chat with my family and you will barely scratch the surface on how far THAT rabbit hole goes (Cray cray). Anywho, I am feeling less cheesy now that I seem to have acquired a companion in the adventures to come in my life. Personally I am working on the sharing details phase. Its been a looooong time since I've had to share anything with a guy. With girls its just so much easier cause girls just kinda talk a lot.

Enough about that though...

So as I was basically running up the stairs at Alkek, you bobcats know what I'm talkin about) I didn't have any problems, or huffing or puffing, or whining or fatigue at all. Its the little things in life that satisfy me... But every semester my huffing is reduced quicker and quicker through the semester. I actually started this semester with minimal huffing. That was a little personal victory for myself. And yet even now, towards the end of the semester, I see all these "fit" people struggling up the stairs and I just look at them and laugh as I prance by with my heavy bag and thunder thighs. Obviously being skinny isn't all its cracked up to be. I only want to be healthy. I'm actually more comfortable with myself than I've ever been. But don't think I'm not still insecure about it. I think the worst part is when I'm at work and my RPh sits ALLLLLLL the way back to where there is only a 2 inch gap between his chair and the shelf so I can't pass, then he scoots in and apologizes many times... I'm just like "uh, you don't have to be in the way if you sit over there..."  I've been slowly working on planting the seed that the seat for the window is better for him. I'm hoping that I can eventually trick him into scooting to the next cpu...

Missed going to the gym yesterday as I was out too late on Sunday night. I didn't get home til 3AM and I just said FTS. NO thanks. So I got out of bed at 10 instead. Tomorrow I am supposed to wake up at the ass crack of dawn to go swimming... I guess that means its an ambien night. Feel free to not call or text me tonight as I will be off my rocker by 10pm. No need to see my mental decline as my brain shuts down for sleep. Lets face it, we've all seen my personal TFLN. Those are pretty hilarious.

check yo self b4 u wreck yo self.

So, I'm kind of notorious. My food of choice has always been hamburgers. Even in the womb! My mother told me that when she was preggers with me she ate a crap ton of hamburgers. I still love them. I had one yesterday. It was pretty damn good. Not the best, but damn delicious.

So yesterday was kind of an amazing day. I had an amazing date at a strawberry field and showed someone a slight depth of how far the rabbit hole goes as far as me and crazy and strawberries. Some of you know that I've slapped my roomie for going after some of my berries... Uncontrollable impulse urges when it comes to those sweet sweet delicious red plump berries. So we are talking the whole time, getting to know you stuff, just good company and conversation the whole time. We went to Sweet Berry Farms which is probably one of the best places ever.  mainly because I'm crazy about strawberries and I don't ever remember a time when I've been able to go fruit picking EVER. So this was a pretty exciting time for me. We filled our box of berries to the brim, and there were signs everywhere that says NO EATING THE BERRIES. This was probably the most irritating part of the whole trip. It was really rough. But you all know me about following rules. TO THE LETTER! Except in the occasion that I set my own rules and break them all the time. But I don't break OTHER peoples rules! hah!

We picked our berries, we had some ice cream and the best strawberry lemonade I've ever had. Granted that place caters to mainly families with children, but who can resist the sweet smell of strawberries wafting through the air on a gorgeous spring day. I felt like a child while I was there. It was a little bit magical. Oh and the guy was great company too ;)

So on the way home we get into a discussion that eventually leads to something that sounds like "u wanna be mah girl?" but way more civilized and not in those exact words at all. So all in all, I gained quite a lot yesterday. A crap ton of berries, a boyfriend, and some new friends too.

I also enjoyed how nobody believed it because I announced it on April Fools. Yes, it really happened. For Realsies.

ANYWAYS back to the important stuff and the whole reason I started this damned blog.

So I weighed in this morning and I'm basically exactly where I started a little over a year ago. HOWEVER. Weight is just a number. Overall I'm healthier and my waistline is smaller (not by much). But I'm constantly headed in the right direction. Yes I like hamburgers, okay yes I really LOVE them... But still, my goals are still alive and kicking and I'm making progress every day.

I finally checked my lab work from the last time I donated a whole pack of blood and my numbers look AWESOME. It really is amazing to SEE the progress your body is making and have this kind of positive reinforcement. Seeing the impact you are making on yourself on a cellular level sans microscope is pretty awesome. So do yourself and everybody else a favor, donate blood and work out and donate more blood and track your progress and keep your HDL and LDL in the proper ranges and keep that LDL on the DL.

The proof is out there...

Alyssa

How assuming made me a certified ass

So you remember how I was like "omg guy laughed at me while talking about kaju, I h8 him."?

Yeah... I was totally wrong. Completely and utterly.  I did the "womanly" thing and just never called or texted him or any of that jazz. Maybe not really the womanly thing, but the straight up bitchy thing (which I'm amazingly good at).

So I get a call from him about a week after incident, I let it go to voice mail (In bitch mode). I listen to said voicemail and it sounded unusually happy... Then I start to ponder... waaaaaaaaaaaaait a minute... this guy has NO clue that I'm irritated with him. So I continue to ponder my options: call him and tell him he is an ass, text him and tell him he is an ass, email him and tell him he is an ass...

While I was pondering he eventually messaged me via email chat and I just confronted the situation that I had been "affronted" by. TURNS OUT I'm a bitch. No... Really... I just assumed he was laughing at  kaju, or me in kaju, or insulting my kajurific ohana or ect. Turns out he was just laughing at the image of grass skirted people beating up military folk.

I apologized profusely and confessed my complete bitchiness to him and apologized some more about how I had written him off and that I was sorry (that was actually difficult for me, but it was necessary as how completely and utterly I messed up by assuming).

Then I go out with him that very night and we had a perfectly wonderful time. How dare that bastard treat me so nicely. Tomorrow we are going fruit picking. Or I'm helping him with yard work. I don't really care as long as I'm out in the sun cause this lady has got some NASTY white legs going on right now. I need to darken up before Ethiopia. I need to blend in a little better. I'm gonna hit the river and the tan in a bottle. Might go dancing tonight too. I need to burn off some energy cause I may or may not have slept til 3-4pm today.

Tonight is the night...

So today we have done the following:

1. Made it to lab on time and misidentified the scientific name for a Texas Mountain Laurel. Apparently you can't know the "brand name" of a plant. Must know generics. I have a hard enough time memorizing drug brand and generic names and now I'm expected to know Sophora secundiflora. I KNEW THE NAME OF THE PLANT, GIVE ME POINTS. Well I accidentally identified the next tables plant instead. No credit. Oh well. I consider the TX MTN Laurel a friggin tree, NOT a shrub. So kiss my arse.

2. Registered for my Ethiopian Adventure officially, as in not just with the study abroad office on campus. Its really happening now. HOLLA! The biggest question I get is WTF are you going to Africa for?! I reply with "to study of course" and they say "WHY?!" and I say "why not?" They never have a response. I'm staying in Addis Ababa which is basically a super black version of Austin. Many languages and cultures. Its actually more closely related to Washington DC as far as nationalities and stuff, not only is AA the capitol of Ethiopia, its the Capitol of the African Union. So thats basically DC.

3. Got silly nasty sweaty at the gym. I was on the elliptical for about 18 minutes when I decided to move along to the treadmill. There was a girl who is about the size of my arm bouncing all kinds of everywhere on the elliptical a few machines down. It was way too distracting so I had to move along. I kept watching her and turning a face like "uhhh da fuck are you doing???" As far as I know you aren't supposed to bounce up and down, you are supposed to squeeze your core and stay as stable as you can to achieve maximum balance and minimum fool-look-a-like-in. But I could be wrong... What do I know? I busted out 120 crunches, 5 girly pushups, and a few leg lifts. I was doing the lifts wrong so I quit doing them. I know its not supposed to hurt but something wasn't right and I kept getting a funny feeling in my knee that was bad.

4. now I relax until the bell doth toll for me to leave for work. I feel like lunch and a nap are at hand. I must be prepared for the worst to happen at work tonight. The worst being that I am late to trivia because of some heart surgery or something today. I wish they would just have those on Monday only... That would indeed make me a happier camper.

So there we go. Its not even noon and I've already had a super productive day. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it.

Alys

PS
Trivia tonight we are going in as champions. The only way someone can catch us is to beat us by 25 points or so. That doesn't mean we are going to coast on easy. I want to win FIRST AGAIN to solidify our legacy. We only got three Ron hosted wins in a row and were dethroned last week. Tonight we come with Vengeance.

You got girl problems? I feel bad for you son...

I got 99 problems and a bitch ain't one. Nah... well... I mean, if you (I) consider yourself (myself) a bitch (which I do) then I guess you (I) could consider yourself (myself) a problem.

These "self destructive" paths (which I will consider questionable decision making skills) I've been on lately have led me down my own personal paths of enlightenment. I am learning what I want out of my future, my present and what I should have done with my past.

Be Aggressive. I should have been more aggressive. To get what you want you have to go out there and GET IT. Well I tried that, granted  only for a month, and I didn't quite get the return on my investment that I had hoped. Magic? Was I searching for magic? That's a part of it. I'm just so aggressive at times that I miss the little things. Whether it be love, a missing puzzle piece (literally, I've torn up apartments before looking for those damn pieces), friendships, feeding the cats at the same time every day, ect.. Today I realized that I have probably damaged a friendship that I didn't realize how wonderful and precious it was. I kind of cast it aside like it wasn't THAT awesome, but it was something I could just leave on my shelf and look at from time to time. Add that to the pile of regret. Oh well... This just leads into my present.

Survival is my top notch priority. Surviving college, surviving my schedule, surviving my balance (or lack thereof sometimes), and keeping everybody happy in the process. I'm very much a pleaser. I like it when others are happy, so for the most part I do what I can to help others. I keep skipping that ONE important person that can make me happiest. MYSELF. DUUUUUUUUUUUUUH ALYSSA. Smack myself on the forehead that time. Why don't you stop and smell the roses? Or the peonies, or the damn gerbera daisies for Petes sake?! Take a moment for yourself.

My future is thankfully unwritten. The pen and pad are nearby, but as soon as I finish my Psych degree I'm just gonna turn right around and go back to school. Hopefully I can figure that out by the time my future becomes my present.

Maybe I'll get lucky and some rich oil tycoon will find me tomorrow, propose marriage and I will foolishly accept on the terms that I hope he dies in my near(er) future and I don't have to provide him with children. What lofty dreams I have... becoming a kept woman... If you know me (and if you're reading this you probably do), you know that nobody can keep me. I can barely keep up with myself.

Well, happy hunting single ladies, and guys good luck finding the crazy that suits you. All girls are crazy, I will be the first, second, and third to tell you that one.

Alyssa

PS
All this stuff about working out! I still didn't make it to the gym today, long day with school and work. TOMORROW is definitely the day I will go to the gym. AND hopefully the sun will peek out for a whole hour while I'm at the river. I can only cross my fingers for that one... PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE SUN COME OUT. IM TOOOOOOOOOOOOOWHITE.


I am also taking requests for subjects to write about. You can message me on FB or write on my wall, or comment here (Sometimes I get writers block and I enjoy discussing things other people have to banter with).

Will the real Slim Alyssa please stand up?

So today was probably the day from hell. The only reason I even performed this act of severe masochism is so that I might partake in my friends Bachelorette party on Friday night. I worked from 7:30am to 8pm with a 30 minute lunch break. I was SO bored at work today, but luckily entertainment came in its own special way.

So today I ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner all at the hospital. Breakfast was one taco with bacon, egg, cheese, and potato. Lunch was a cheeseburger. Dinner, well this is where it gets kind of kinky and new for me... Dinner was a Quesadilla. Whats so strange about this normal snack/appetizer of choice at many a restaurant? Was it the chicken? no, that was pretty standard as well... The kicker was that this thing had spinach on it. I was in a bit of a quandry when I was trying to decide what to eat for dinner. On the elevator at work I happened to bump into the head chef and I just asked him "what do I do?" and he told me some things off the top of his head. Something about fresh fish, no thanks, something about a pork chop, no thanks, something about a club sammich, no thanks, and then he dropped the Q bomb. yes please. So I gave it a shot as soon as I knew what it was all about. I regret nothing. It was delish. SO YUUMMMMERRRRRSSSS...

Anywhoserwhatsits.

I obviously didn't get a chance to go to the gym today as I am completely run down on my batteries. I've had some interesting run ins as of late, and I've gotten the chance to get to know some friends better. All in all life is bueno and me gusta.

In other news, my recent adventures have helped me let go of control a little bit. Only a little bit though. Cause damn, you and I both know that I'm terrible at not trying to run things. The day I say "to hell with it all" will be a very cold one indeed.

Alyssa

Can anybody find me?

So my recent adventures you've read about are in dateland. Well honestly at this point I am SURROUNDED with people getting married/engaged/happily ever afters and all that lovey dovey shit. I would be lying if I said that I didn't want any of that. The problem is: I DO want all of that. A long time ago back when I was "happy" I always had someone I could talk to about anything regardless of the subject. I miss that companionship above all other things.

I think the lessons I've learned so far from dating are these:

1. Just about every guy is an asshole, so you need to find the asshole you can tolerate and work with the best.
2. My perception of "self sabotage" is totally wrong, and it just makes men want you more, be blunter.
3. Don't dwell on the past. Especially the "great white buffalo." You haven't met him yet. Most likely...
4. Don't deal with flaky people. It only angers you. You know how not being on time drives you INSANE.
5. D&D is NOT an acceptable use of free time for ANY potential boyfriend. ever. EVER.
6. Don't put up with people who disrespect you and the things/people you care about. EVER. (duh)

And many more I've yet to define. I'm supposed to be driving to Austin now, so I'm gonna finish being side tracked, fill up my car with gas and get my ass on the road. Happy Travels my friends!

PS
Only went to the gym once last week I KNOW ITS TERRIBLE. I have a lot of pent up energy and I ended up with some questionable bruises that I'm not totally sure how I got them from last night...


I know this is gonna sound REALLY super cheesy coming from cynical me, but I really just want someone to love and love me in return. Someone more than my cats, youknowwhatimsayin?!

Deuces,
Alyssa

Don't you hate it when your options of who you can get naked in front of are limited?

So, as far as the title goes who doesn't have body image issues? I've been dealing with it basically since I got to Texas because that's when my initial "omgwtfbbq" started in my head which lead me down the path that I am currently on. Recently with the dating a lot of people have been telling me something along these lines: You're beautiful.  All I can reply to that with is either laugh nervously and say "okay, thanks. Insert return compliment here" or "hah, yeah whatever." One even went so far as to say "No, really." Most girls have trouble with those words as they have spent a good amount of time nit picking themselves about what they hate on their body. I am definitely not an exception to that rule. But I am probably going to continue laughing nervously or "yeah whatever-ing" until someone can make be believe it. I'd really like to believe.

St. Pattys Sassafrass

So this weekend was the glorious American holiday St. Patricks day. Yeah, it IS an American holiday. There are more Irish in America than in Ireland anyways. SO, that is beside the point. I've been looking forward to St. Pattys for a while... like all year, since the last one (cause it sucked so hard). You can imagine my disappointment when on the day of the big event, I just wasn't feeling like it... I had huge plans to get completely sloshed and enjoy it properly with kilts, music, entertainment and friends. Well, I just wasn't feeling it that day. I got off work and I was just ready to crash. I wanted to go home, but I had already agreed to go to the Dog & Duck pub with some friends. I planned on making an appearance, catching a movie with a different friend. My plan changed COMPLETELY. So I get to the D&D pub, wander around, find my friend R and head over to El Mercado. I am totally okay drinking a margarita on an "Irish" holiday. So I ended up making some new friends that day. D&D ended up being waaaaaaaaay too busy for our liking so we went on the bar prowl. We ended up at hooters (my first time ever) and I was completely horrified at the number of disgusting men oogling the waitresses. I was also irritated at the fact that the waitresses were already skinny, but their uniforms forced them into a muffin top type of situation. WHY IS THAT NECESSARY?!?! I spent a lot of time complaining about the clientele. The food wasn't horrible, but I've had WAY better wings at Sean Patricks in SM... While we were there my movie got cancelled because of it getting sold out. Ultimately I was having a good time with the small group I was with so instead of going home I stayed in town. Dropped off my car at my friends house, and then we all headed off to Billy's on Burnet.

At Billy's we got some drinks and were just hanging out. It was a good time overall. I also got to visit with my uncle who lives three blocks away from the bar. Played some game called catch phrase with them (uncles party), kicked ass at it... and then I went back to my pals at the bar. My friend went home early and I ended up hanging out with my new friend for a while. At last call some guys walked in and looked around confused. At this point I was feeling a little fresh and sassy, which means tipsy, and they were looking a bit on the nerdy side. So as they looked around confused I said to them "You missed last call, you played D&D too late tonight." In hindsight I was probably a little mean cause they were only looking for a drink to chillax and hang out with their friends, which is exactly what I was there doing. IM SUCH A HORRIBLE PERSON. oh well, I'm sure karma will bite me in the ass like it usually does.

 After Billys we ended up at LaLa's (which I used to live behind). Another first time place for me.  It was really interesting. I didn't really look around too much, but it was quite the sight to see from what I could see. Its a dive bar, the second in my life that I've ever been to but it was more entertaining than the first.

Long story short I ended up having a great day and had an interesting twist of fate.

I didn't work out at all over spring break, and I felt like I did nothing but eat this weekend. One of my beers tasted like a bread sandwich. School is back in session, and I'm back on the bandwagon after I finish these chips and dip...

Aly.

Horrible realization...

Well this time last year I was adamantly obsessed with drinking slim fast and sticking to the program... I know that because on Facebook I changed my photo to one that was July of last year. First comment: You look really great. Something like that... Well, if you compare that photo to one I took maybe a week ago you would say "DAMN ALYSSA WTF HAPPENED?" And I would reply..."American food... and no self control." Well its true. All counts. So yeah, here I am again working on a chocolate shake diet, working out, and cursing my own name for giving up on myself last year. STICK TO THE PROGRAM. I know it sucks, just DO IT. Nike that shit. Changing habits is the hardest thing to do. As I struggle to coerce myself into eating that salad instead of that big fat juicy cheeseburger with all the fixins, I just need to remind myself... YOU NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT FATTY. I also need to build a program for myself that works a lot better with my current schedule. As its spring break, the rec is closed and I have zero motivation to go out running with this crap weather surrounding us. Tough Mudder is in October, and I have a reasonable goal of losing a considerable amount of weight by then. I might just go to crazy town in July when I get back. AKA Crossfit. That will really pump me up by october... Watch out G, I'm comin...

 I told myself I was going to have an adventure this spring break because I haven't done it since High School... Well, I got a new job and its a little early to ask for a whole week off... Considering there are only two employees that can really cover it. That and I am having a whole June off in the next coming months. Yesterday the weather was BEAUTIFUL. Perfect temperature, a great breeze, and I was floating on cloud 9 all day. Work was pie, and things were just trucking along. I love that its still daylight when its 7pm now. I am going to have a happy dance about the weather soon, cause this winter bullshit was weighing me WAY down. Time to come out of your hibernation holes folks. Its time to get physical!

Cheers!
Alyssa

Not really sure that women belong in the kitchen...

So last night I had a date. I was making my "famed" spaghetti (my friends love it!) and he offered to help, so I asked him to do the one thing I hated most. Chopping the onions and garlic. WHOA. I had chopped the edges off the onion, and then he instantly starts to school me. Did I mention he used to be a chef before he changed careers? Yeah. So after he educated me on why I was wrong (I even took the constructive criticism quite well) I went back to working on the sauce and cooking the meat. I turn around, and there are two perfect little piles of onion and garlic. They were PERFECT. How the fuck does that happen!? My onions look all kinds of jenky and wonky and they were in the best little pile. I wanted to drop my spatula and walk out of the kitchen with my head held low. BUT LO! I manned up and kept on. Nothing like a little internal perseverance to tackle that nervousness to make someone feel better. But once the sauce was near completion I started to get really nervous. What was he going to think? Someone who actually knows about how flavors work, and what goes with what, and how food chemistry works was about to eat MY spaghetti... Something I've gotten millions of compliments on in the past was about to be eaten by someone who actually knows how to make proper spaghetti... WHAT ANXIETY! I just rubbed some garlic on it to help with that. As I nervously sat down at the table with him, I said "dig in!" and he took the first bite, as I just stared at him like a crazy person, anxiously awaiting the thumbs up or the thumbs down... I know he knew how paranoid I was because I straight up told him. He said he liked my spaghetti, so I guess that's a personal victory? FOOD WIN. The real question is, is the way to a man's heart still through his stomach? Stay tuned.


Anyways, I'll update you now on the things I know you're really here to read about! MY WORKING OUT! yaaaay!!!

So last week I was REALLY good at going to the gym on Monday and Wednesday. But on Friday when I went, the gym was CLOSED. It was all kinds of rainy and gross so like hell I was going to freeze my butt off in the rain. No thanks. So I ended up giving a friend a ride to the grocery store, and I ended up with a bag of my favorite candy: Quaxi. (aka gummy frogs). Most counterproductive attempt at going to the gym EVER. Now its closed all of spring break, so I'm basically stuck at home only playing just dance by myself cause I hate going on the track at the hospital by myself. That place is creepy as hell at night and that's when I work out.

I saw a couple of great movies this week too. All old. I'm only looking forward to 21 Jump Street this friday, so I'm probably gonna see it alone due to my inconvenient schedule. Whatever, I'm a grown independent woman. I can do whatever I want! Anybody wanna come with? Lol... anywhooooooo

I'm done updating you on my personal life for now. I'll be back when the adventure continues!

Here we go again.

So here we are again. A long hiatus between blogs... My deepest apologies! So with the beginning of the semester and the grueling work/study schedule I have, I've been going cray-cray. Well to add some extra crazy into my daily regime I took the plunge into online dating. I know, you're probably thinking "what self respecting person would do that?!" to answer your question... this one. In my defense, I went to one of those reputable sites called Match.com.

Its been a great (and terrifying) experience. What with all the non-threatening rejection, and some interesting creepers coming after me, I decided to obsessively go to the gym 3-4 times a week. MWF and sundays. Actually, I decided to start training for the tough mudder in October. I'm dead serious about this one. Not only to prove to myself that I can do it, but to throw it in other peoples faces of course. I'm a badass, and I kind of want everybody to know it.

So this morning I went to my Bio lab, and then I went to the gym. I busted some serious calories on the elliptical machine, then I went over to the arm machine and did some of that to help build up my shoulder. I went on the Abductor/Adductor machine. I find it interesting that its so much easier to open your legs on that machine than to close your legs... HMMMM coincidence? I bet that machine was built by a man... Then I did about 120 crunches (actually exactly 120), a couple of planks, and then I got bored so I went to the post office to check my PO Box. So yeah, its only 11AM and I've already had a really productive day :) what have YOU done?